When you’ve experienced your own broken heart you easily recognize one in another. Today watching families revisit the sites where they lost their loved ones on September 11, 2001, you aren’t surprised how much their pain is still so close to the surface. Some pain is too big to fade, the best you can hope for is learning to live with it, to go on, not let it defeat you, yet respect it.
Today for me is also a day where two precious souls in my life are being baptized. Reminding me of eternity, how life truly doesn’t end, perhaps not in the way we’d like but in a way we can never imagine on this earth. To fortitude, peace, love and courage, may we never forget what is lasting and let go of what gets in the way of our remembering that every single day.
Nope, I’m no Charlie Hustle, aka, Pete Rose. 4192 has nothing to do with my stats for baseball, rather 4192 is the number of hits to my blog, not to a baseball. Who would have thought that when this silly idea started a couple of years ago that anybody would have read my thoughts…..but here we are at a record-breaking number for me! Just like in baseball numbers are a big deal in life. We measure every thing; motivation often comes from those numbers. This is my 75th post!
I confess I check to see what people have been interested in enough to read, what they seem to like verse not. Sometimes I think it’s in the title, that catches the attention, but you have to eventually say something funny or otherwise interesting to keep people coming back. I’m not going to start a radio talk show with these kind of numbers, I’m not Dr. Phil or Oz with a spin-off from Oprah but I do secretly hope that maybe I’ve motivated someone to stick with something that they just as soon could have given up on. I’m going to tell myself that there are folks just like me out there that needed a push and some encouragement to get the ball rolling. To do something so NOT fun for the sake of the good.
Anyhoo, enough of my rambles for today, the next person who reads this blog gets a lifetime supply of……………………….
Wow, it’s been a year this month that I started “thoughtsintraction” and two years ago that I started traction. I’m headed on vacation for a couple of weeks and although I probably won’t post while I’m away trust that traction will travel with me. Thanks for helping me stay on this journey. It’s definitely had its moments of uncertainty, laziness, pain, stupidity, silliness and self-pity. Thanks for hanging in there with me……don’t worry about sending a card, Hallmark has yet to market the corner on “Happy Hanging, you look so much taller than you did last year!” or better yet, “Numb fingers used to be a problem, but thanks to traction you can open this card sent just to you!” or maybe something along the line of “Tick Tock Traction Time is here to stay and we couldn’t miss the chance to say “Hang in There!”
OK, I’m being quite the smarty pants and there’s no card for that either, so I’ll just say, I’ll be back in a few to start year two of typing and three of hanging, can’t wait.
Listening to O filii et filiae sung by the choir of Notre Dame de Paris. Not a bad way to start this Holy Saturday, yeah, forget the traction part and just go with this music. Hope your weekend is everything you’d want it to be, the strife is over and even if it’s not, pretend.
As for my own Lenten challenge, I did ok, not great. I did read a heck of a lot and explored new topics that I previously knew nothing about, not sure how long I’ll remember any of it but I tried. I did dabble here and there in some of my other thoughts “to do more” but consistency is always an issue. Actually, the only thing I’m consistent at now is TRACTION! Anyhoo, even if the strife is far from over in your life celebrate what you can because if all you know is pain you’ll never know the opposite even if it hits you in the face.
Hang in there, that’s what I do and it works out ok. In the wise words of my friend Carl, “don’t ever, ever, ever give up.”
I’m worried I’m becoming that person that leaves their blinker on and doesn’t know it. You know that driver, they’re strolling along the interstate with their left blinker on completely without a clue. When I was younger I’d pass that person and think how can anyone be that out of it?!
Well, I’m not sure it’s about cluelessness anymore, since my hearing isn’t what it used to be maybe it’s partly that, maybe I’m afraid what it’s about. What is it that Gertrude Stein said, “one does not get better, but different and older and that is always a pleasure.” Well, we’ll see about that one Gert. But hey, I try to keep up, I’ve never been a person you’d describe as “hip” but hey I listen to indie music, I know that if someone describes themself as a “cutter” that doesn’t mean they’re out in the kitchen slicing tomatoes. I know the difference between the low down and the down low, ok, so I’m not dead, yet. So this blinker thing, it’s not really happened but I feel it’s around the corner. Along with crumbs on my shirt and farting at random. Life is just one slippery slope to losing it all, so we have to live people! We have to get out there, not be so afraid, jump out of airplanes or at least get on one and go some place you’ve never been. Stop comparing ourselves to everybody else and enough with the insecurity, before you know it you’re going to be dead so who cares! Live, live, live and turn your blinker off, you look like a dope.
Nah, I didn’t faint while I was sitting in traction, nor did the rope snap over my head sending ten pounds of water flying. I’ve been doing my traction thing, just haven’t posted in a while because there wasn’t much to say. Not that I’ve ever had anything fascinating to type in this world of traction but recently I just didn’t find much that felt worthy of your time. Then I remembered my initial promise that nothing fancy or exciting would be happening here; the purpose of thoughtsintraction is to keep a fire under me and hold me accountable to sit here three times a week. To pull my neck so that it frees up some cervical space to ultimately allow these fingers to maintain their abilities. One look at me and you’d know I’ve been doing my part as my neck now looks like I could be a model for an offensive lineman’s helmet catalog, hey, here’s the latest chic cervical ensemble from the NFL, who knew?
So as a result of this lovely look I’m expanding my scarf collection; even though Summer is tugging at our flip-flops I plan to be wearing scarfs all season, hopefully in a breathable fabric, while eating apple pie, slicing watermelon, driving my Chevy and saluting the flag on the fourth with a very snappy star-spangled scarf around my super size neck. AND, if my collection excels and expands I hope to not only conceal at first glance the O Lineman’s neck, but secretly support all the screwedupness within.
Blackout lifted, fingers working, silly thoughts commence.
Way before the “Rocky movies” with Sylvester Stallone there was another Rocky, a real Rocky, Rocky Graziano. At some point in my life I watched an old movie starring Paul Newman playing this middleweight champion. It’s based on a true story; it’s sentimental and sweet and ends just as you’d want any sentimental and sweet old movie to end. One of the final scenes in the movie, Rocky aka, Paul Newman points to the sky and says, “somebody up there likes me.” Well, today I said the same thing as I was saved from what could have been an unpleasant tumble to the ground. I’ve mentioned before how I can’t feel my left foot, my sciatic nerve is damaged at the root in my spinal column; as a result, I can walk on my foot but don’t ask it for much else. I’ve also mentioned one of the reasons I do traction is because I have difficulty feeling my hands, traction relieves pressure from my neck, therefore helping the hands. Anyhoo, so today a plastic shopping bag slid out of my hand and I didn’t notice nor did I hear it fall right in front of my path and then I tripped over it because I couldn’t feel it! I just happened to catch myself as I was walking up a step, fortunately there was something to grab onto as I started to fall. As soon as I recovered I pointed to the sky and said, somebody up there likes me!
It could have been an ugly one-two punch, but other than feeling a little shaken I was fine. I will never win a middleweight championship boxing match, which is really ok; but I like feeling “old blue eyes,” Paul Newman and friends are smiling on me.